I have read so many articles, books, blogs, medical publishes all about endometriosis and pcos over the past 8 years in the faint hope that one of them would have a miracle cure for the pain. I am sorry to tell you I haven't found one yet! Of all the side effects and symptoms these illnesses cause me (fatigue, weight gain, excess hair, hair loss, infertility, depression to name but a few) pain is by far the worst one! It has got to the point where I don't even know how many pain killers I take when it's a bad day. Recently I started to think that maybe the naproxen and morphine patches I take for the pain were not actually working. I was having so many bad days, so many painful days that I forgot what a pain free day was like. So, before I went to the doctors (again) I tried a little experiment. I stopped taking my naproxen for a week to see if the pain was any different without them? I guess I assumed that they were not making a difference due to the level of pain I had been suffering lately. I assumed not taking them would make no difference to that pain........
Oh how wrong I was! From the first 24 hours without I was in agony from waking til sleep! The pain was so intense at points I was in tears. When I describe how the pain feels to someone who has no idea of endometriosis I say "it's like being stabbed by thousands of tiny swords from the inside out" and during these few pain med free days I felt like this every day. I only managed 4 days before I had to take them again. I couldn't believe I was in so much more pain when I was still using my morphine patch.
You may be thinking why would I even entertain doing this? Well the answer is simple, I was tired of relying on medication to get me through a day. The pain was bad even when taking them and I was hoping if the pain did not change I could drop a tablet or two and maybe get some of my energy back. Maybe feel stronger and be able to fight this illness a little better.
So, what did I learn?
I learnt that I need to trust in my doctor when he says that taking all these tablets will help me.
I learnt that my pain threshold is so much stronger than I knew.
I learnt that bad can always be overshadowed by unbearable.
Most importantly I learnt sometimes what seems like a good idea can be a very stupid one!
I can promise I won't be doing it again any time soon!
💙Have a pain free day all!!💙
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